With terrorists lurking behind every artificial plant, the first thing I do when I get a new job is to get on a first name basis with one of the security guards. You know, just in case the shooting starts I want the guy with the gun to know I am a friendly.
I had been chatting up Berto for quite a while; I picked him because he was the only guard who appeared fit enough not to have a heart attack if bullets did start flying. Anyway, one day last November Berto was gone. Maybe a vacation or illness? As the days passed I grew more and more concerned and finally asked the dour uniformed woman with the platinum blonde dye job if she knew what happened to Berto. She looked at me like she didn’t know what I was talking about.
Months passed, no Berto. Only recently had I resigned myself to chatting up another security guard (those terrorists are still lurking). Then today, as I strolled out for lunch, who should be standing at the escalator kiosk, but Berto himself. It turns out his gun card expired and, evidently, the State lost the first renewal form he sent. The company told him to stay home until he had a valid gun card. He was home almost 4 months – without pay! That is a pretty lousy deal and, let’s not forget, he had possession of his gun the whole time! I was very glad to have him back and told him so.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Before anyone gets the idea that being a security guard might be a good temp job for the Smoking Christian, please consider the danger this would put him into. Remember, he has a wife and kids. So I am seriously considering issuing a church prohibition forbidding any member from holding a job that would require the owning or use of a handgun. (As the church's token Democrat I oppose private ownership of handguns anyway.)
Protonotary?
Oh no....please don't get Mr. Yak started...
Mrs. Yak
Post a Comment